Congratulations: You just won your very own, one of a kind, model of Me. With Me, you would never have to worry about not receiving something special on your Birthday, Christmas, Mothers Day, etc., or not receiving a phone call informing you whether or not I'll be late for dinner.

With Me, you'll never have to worry about me choosing to hang out with the fellas instead of being home engulfed in the warmth of your love, so with Me, being stranded during those difficult, troublesome times would be a thing of the past. Instead, with Me, you'd be watched upon as a guard dog does his Masters property, only  because with Me, in my eyes you'll always appear to shine like a diamond.

Lifetime Guarantee of Love and Loyalty. If within receipt of me, you are not completely satisfied for any reason, you can replace me, no questions asked.